I did a bad thing today!
I brought my child a toy when he didn't deserve one. We have an unwritten rule in our house, that we don't just randomly buy toys for the kids unless it's a birthday or a special reward for good behaviour and today I broke that rule.
However there was logic to my moment of madness...
Recently my sweet blue eyed baby boy has turned into, well, a devil child! He screams at me, throws himself on the floor, pushes his sister around and just generally does the opposite of everything I tell him to. It actually got to the point where I thought there was something wrong with him, I'd convinced myself that he must have brain damage because know one can have such an extreme change of personality in a month. (I have since been informed that it is not brain damage and he is just being 3).
After hearing about the 'terrible two's' and how he sailed through that year without a single tantrum or raised voice I did not see this coming.
Anyway back to the subject, so I now have a devil child and I wake up every morning with a feeling of dread, knowing that I have to face a whole day of abuse and raised voices.
I told Phil how I felt this morning and he suggested that I do something with him to keep him amused.
His teachers at pre school recently told me that he spends a lot of time doing puzzles so I thought I'd give it a go, problem was we don't have any puzzles at home. So this is why I had to buy him a toy when he didn't deserve one.
We went to the shops and got a puzzle and he's been playing with it all day. It's definatley been the best day we've had in over a month. There was still the odd tantrum inbetween puzzle making but nothing like it normally is. Result!
I'm still not proud of what I did but I've got to say it was the best £5 I've ever spent.
I brought my child a toy when he didn't deserve one. We have an unwritten rule in our house, that we don't just randomly buy toys for the kids unless it's a birthday or a special reward for good behaviour and today I broke that rule.
However there was logic to my moment of madness...
Recently my sweet blue eyed baby boy has turned into, well, a devil child! He screams at me, throws himself on the floor, pushes his sister around and just generally does the opposite of everything I tell him to. It actually got to the point where I thought there was something wrong with him, I'd convinced myself that he must have brain damage because know one can have such an extreme change of personality in a month. (I have since been informed that it is not brain damage and he is just being 3).
After hearing about the 'terrible two's' and how he sailed through that year without a single tantrum or raised voice I did not see this coming.
I told Phil how I felt this morning and he suggested that I do something with him to keep him amused.
His teachers at pre school recently told me that he spends a lot of time doing puzzles so I thought I'd give it a go, problem was we don't have any puzzles at home. So this is why I had to buy him a toy when he didn't deserve one.
We went to the shops and got a puzzle and he's been playing with it all day. It's definatley been the best day we've had in over a month. There was still the odd tantrum inbetween puzzle making but nothing like it normally is. Result!
I'm still not proud of what I did but I've got to say it was the best £5 I've ever spent.
I would say on this day that you were the best mommy you have ever been. Of course, I don't know you, but positive reinforcement and positive redirection are two of the most powerful parenting techniques ever invented. Why should kids only get gifts on their birthday and other special occasions? It seems like they are being rewarded just for showing up. By the way, educational resources like puzzles and games are not toys, they are an investment in the future of your children. I buy my kids things all the time such as books, games, puzzles, educational software. It's all about the future. We went through all the difficult stages and my girls are now 10 and 12 and people tell me very often they are the most delightful children they have ever met. They are well-rounded, knowledgeable, polite, talented, caring, kind, considerate, well-spoken. I can't imagine having produced children with these attributes had I only bought them "toys" two or three times per year. I do, of course, limit pure toys, but my children did not turn out spoiled in the least because I also taught them values and an attitude of gratitude. In my opinion, guilt is a useless emotion unless you have harmed someone deliberately. Cheers.
ReplyDeletehas his change of personality coincided with the school holidays? Mine havn't reached preschool yet but a few of my friends have said that their angels become devilish over the hols! Would defo say puzzles are educational rather than toys though as they need to be changed with ability rather than age etc x
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