Showing posts with label playdough. Show all posts
Showing posts with label playdough. Show all posts

Wednesday, 9 May 2012

Mummy CV

Career Objective
 A full-time position in Mummyness where I can demonstrate my cleaning, washing and running around after everyone else skills.

I can work for 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year without sick pay, days off  or holidays.

If you are seeking a person that is so tired that they end up putting the kettle in the fridge and the milk in the washing machine then I’m the woman for you. 

Summary of Skills 

  • Cook
  • Cleaner
  • Taxi Driver
  • Bottle Washer
  • Nappy Changer 
  • Councellor
  • Negotiator 
  • Nurse
  • Fluent in Baby Gibberish
  • Stain Removing Skills
  • Healing Hands
  • Great Intuition
  • Teacher
  • Referee 
  • Maid
  Career Highlights

  • Finally getting baby to go to sleep after hours of rocking
  • Getting a fussy toddler to eat a brussel sprout
  • Building a home out of playdough
  • Getting the crayon marks off of the wall
  • Keeping a child amused with a upside down tin and a wooden spoon
  • Getting everyone up, dressed, fed & out of the house in under and hour
  • Surviving their first day of school without becoming a nervous wreck
  • Shopping in Tesco with two children and coming out in one piece & with everything I went in for  
  • Cooking an 'almost' edible meal while having a screaming toddler clung to one leg