Have you succeeded?

A group of us were talking today about success and what they needed to do in their lives to feel like they have succeeded. 

The men all related success to their careers, how much they earnt and what cars they drive. The woman however had a variety of different answers varying from raising children, having a career, helping other people and creating a stable home environment.

I beleive my father found the best answer to the question 'What is success?'.

When I was growing up he had a poster in our downstairs toilet  with the following quote on it and to me it completley somes up what success is...

To laugh often and much; To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; To appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded  

Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803 - 1882) American Essayist & Poet

So how would you judge success and do you feel that you have succeeded in life?

Image by Hartwig HKD

Do all mother's lose their identity?

I was going through some boxes full of old stuff that I’ve collected over the years and came across loads of photo’s of me (pre – babies) and I can’t believe how much I have changed in such a short space of time.

Pre children I was the life and soul of a party, mine was the house that everyone use to hang out at, whether it be a massive party, a big old bbq or a sing song round the fire pit (handmade by me from an old oil drum).  Whatever the group decided to do it would be at mine and looking back through those photos reminded me just how often we use to do things like that.

 

Image by Jason Brown

I never spent a huge amount of time pampering etc but if I was going out for the evening I would always make an effort to make myself feel good , nowadays I would rather choice to stay in than go out at all, mainly because I can’t muster up the energy to get ready, by the time I’ve put the kids to bed all I want to do is die on the sofa with a well earned glass of vino.

 Image by Oliver323

Although looking back through those old photo’s did make me feel a slight prang of longing for my pre baby, single life it also made me realise how meaninless my life actually was. I had bounced from course to course not really knowing what I wanted to do, I’d also bounced from boyfriend to boyfriend not really wanting to be with any of them, and even with all the parties, friends and wild nights I was the most depressed and lonely I have ever been in my life.

Now however, even though I’m tired, constantly look like I’ve been dragged through a hedge backwards and  have a serious case of agrophobia, I have never been happier in my life.

 Image by Peyri Herrera

 I never really get these woman that say things like ‘Just because I have children now doesn’t mean my life will have to change’. Mainly because I don’t see how it is possible to have children and your life not to change. Whether it be having less time to spend on the way you look, constantly feeling tired or it always becoming a military operation just to get out of the house. No one plans for them to take over your life, they just do.

Finding the balance between being the best mummy that you can but at the same time still feeling like a human being has to be the hardest thing about being a mother.

 Image by Darek Zon

So how much have your lives changed since having kids?

Terrifying experience

Last night the most terrifying thing happened to me and I woke up this morning feeling totally confused and scared.

In the night I awoke with a start because I thought I could hear H in our room, which was weird on it’s own because he never gets out of bed on his own in the night. I then went to sit up to have a look and realised that I was completely paralised! I literally couldn’t move any of my body, not even lift my head of of the pillow.
I completley freaked out and then I got confused because I thought I might still be asleep and was having one of those Lucid dreams where you can control what goes on in your dream.

I could still hear the noise in our room that I thought was H, still unable to move and then I freaked myself out even more by thinking that it was a ghost or spirit. Our new house is very old so this idea plays on my mind quite a bit.

Image by Mark Strozier

The last thing I remember was laying there, still paralised, and trying to convince myself that I was just dreaming and made myself go back to sleep.

The next thing I knew it was morning and I woke up really shaken up and freaked out! I told the other half about it straight away and he said that he remembered reading something about that kind of thing on the internet. I looked it up and apparently it’s called ‘Sleep Paralysis’.

‘A person may wake up and find themselves unable to move or speak as if they are frozen. He also may hear footsteps, see a ghost like creature or feel someone sitting on his chest.Throughout the history, people considered this phenomenon as work done by evil spirits. However, the modern science can explain the terrifying event as a Sleep Paralysis.’

‘A sleep paralyisis is possible a hereditary disorder in which one experiences very frightening seconds or minutes of total body paralysis. A victim in this state feels awake but he cannot move or speak. Common symptoms include feeling choked or suffocated, hearing strange noises like footsteps and voices, seeing beings or dark shadows and feeling an existance of someone in the room. ‘

‘When a person sleeps, his brain sends signals to inhibit any muscle contraction. If he comes into consciousness before the brain sends signals to activate muscle contraction, he cannot move his body and consequently becomes paralyzed.’

‘How an episode of sleep paralisis induces visual or auditory hallucinations is still not clear but it seems to have a significant relationship with anxiety.’

 SOURCE - Serendip’sexchange

I don’t really know what happened last night but one thing I know for sure is that I never ever want it to happen again and the stupid thing is that I’m now worried about going to sleep tonight.

It does, however, show you just how powerful the human mind really is.

Image by reighleblanc

I'm back!

We have internet at last, yey. 

Six weeks of being cut off from the world, I feel like I've missed out on something, not quite sure what though lol.

So what have I missed in the world of mummy blogging then? 

It's amazing how as soon as you don't have something, you realise how much you actually rely on it. 

I hope I still have some followers?

xgx

Pinterest Party - Heaven

This is my first week with joining in with this so I hope I've got it right.
The theme for this weeks 'Pinterest Party' is 'Heaven'.
This is the pic I have chosen...

Photo originally by Vogue
Re-pinned on Pinterest from If The Lamp Shade Fits

I have chosen this picture because this would be my idea of heaven. I could just imagine sitting out there with a nice glass of white wine, some olives and cured meat and all of your family around you. Lovely.

To check out other peoples entries for this week go over to Moors Mummy blog, you could even join in too.