Potty Hell

***Warning this post contains poo issues***
Im really starting to worry now about H and his potty training or lack of it for that matter.

He'll be 3 and a half soon and still wears nappies!

Since he's been born he has never had what I would call a proper number 2. 

He has a milk intolerance and dairy products don't really agree with him and the resulting effect resembles something that looks like it's come out of a cow. So add that to the fact that he has a number two at least 4 times a day it's making the potty training impossible.

I don't think he even knows when he has gone and would quite happily sit in a dirty nappy all day if I didn't change him.

He never tells me if he does a number 1 or 2 whereas our 18 month old is already telling us when she is going. 

We stopped forcing the potty issue with him a while ago because it was clear that he just wasn't ready but now it's got to the point where all of his friends of the same age are in pants and using the toilet. He's the only one still left in nappies! 

So I started it up again the other day by taking away his nappies and putting him in pants. This resulted in me having to clear up three wee's and two poo's off of my floor all within the space of an hour. My carpet can't take much more.

I took him to the doctors the other day and I've now demanded to have full allergy testing done so that we can find out exactlly what it is that is upsetting his tummy. Then we can eliminate whatever it is completley from his diet and hopefully that will firm him up a bit.  
Then hopefully we might get somewhere with it.

If anyone has any suggestions or tips it would be much appreciated.

Mummy CV

Career Objective

 A full-time position in Mummyness where I can demonstrate my cleaning, washing and running around after everyone else skills.

I can work for 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year without sick pay, days off  or holidays.

If you are seeking a person that is so tired that they end up putting the kettle in the fridge and the milk in the washing machine then I’m the woman for you. 

Summary of Skills 

• Cook
• Cleaner
• Taxi Driver
• Bottle Washer
• Nappy Changer 
• Councellor
• Negotiator 
• Nurse
• Fluent in Baby Gibberish
• Stain Removing Skills
• Healing Hands
• Great Intuition
• Teacher
• Referee 
• Maid

  Career Highlights

Finally getting baby to go to sleep after hours of rocking Getting a fussy toddler to eat a brussel sprout Building a home out of playdough Getting the crayon marks off of the wall Keeping a child amused with a upside down tin and a wooden spoon Getting everyone up, dressed, fed & out of the house in under and hour Surviving their first day of school without becoming a nervous wreck Shopping in Tesco with two children and coming out in one piece & with everything I went in for   Cooking an 'almost' edible meal while having a screaming toddler clung to one leg

 

The First Five Years

 The first five years of a little ones life are by far the most important in terms of their development and also for setting a good foundation of morals and values.

 'The experiences of the child during such sensitive periods may shape his or her future course of development in a manner that will be difficult to change later'. (Introduction to Psychology)

Research has also shown that the first five years are particulary important for the development of the childs brain. These early experiences will have a direct impact on how the child will develop social and emotional skills which will have an effect on them for the rest of their lives. 

'Children learn more quickly during their early years than at any other time in life. They need love and nurturing to develop a sense of trust and security that turns into confidence as they grow'. (Facts for Life)

 Image by Christina Welsh

'New research shows the critical impact of a child's "environment of relationships" on developing brain architecture during the first months and years of life. ' (Harvard University)

Now I don't know about you but this kind of thing really freaks me out. I have two children under 5 and I am constantly worried about everything I do with them and how that will effect them later on in life. Whether it be letting them watch a bit too much TV, sometimes forgetting to brush their teeth or losing my temper with them because they have just pushed me too far that day and then spending the entire evening feeling like the worst Mother in the world.

Image by Nichole

 They say the first five years are the most crucial for the childs development but what they don'y say is that it's also the hardest years for the Mother. 

There will never again be a time where they will be so demanding of you, totally rely on you for everything from wiping their bums, feeding and clothing them to seeing to them when they wake in the night. 

So my question is, that if a Mother is already under so much pressure just to get through a day with everyone in one piece, how can any of this so called 'breakthrough research' really help us?

We already know that our children look to us for guidance and reassurance in this big scary world. We already know that to much TV is bad for them. We already know they need to eat fruit and veg everyday and we already know that we must teach them right from wrong. 
So how about trusting us Mothers to bring up our children the best we can and just letting us get on with it. They don't call it Mother's Intuition for nothing you know.

Image by Chirastar

Have you succeeded?

A group of us were talking today about success and what they needed to do in their lives to feel like they have succeeded. 

The men all related success to their careers, how much they earnt and what cars they drive. The woman however had a variety of different answers varying from raising children, having a career, helping other people and creating a stable home environment.

I beleive my father found the best answer to the question 'What is success?'.

When I was growing up he had a poster in our downstairs toilet  with the following quote on it and to me it completley somes up what success is...

To laugh often and much; To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; To appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded  

Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803 - 1882) American Essayist & Poet

So how would you judge success and do you feel that you have succeeded in life?

Image by Hartwig HKD

Do all mother's lose their identity?

I was going through some boxes full of old stuff that I’ve collected over the years and came across loads of photo’s of me (pre – babies) and I can’t believe how much I have changed in such a short space of time.

Pre children I was the life and soul of a party, mine was the house that everyone use to hang out at, whether it be a massive party, a big old bbq or a sing song round the fire pit (handmade by me from an old oil drum).  Whatever the group decided to do it would be at mine and looking back through those photos reminded me just how often we use to do things like that.

 

Image by Jason Brown

I never spent a huge amount of time pampering etc but if I was going out for the evening I would always make an effort to make myself feel good , nowadays I would rather choice to stay in than go out at all, mainly because I can’t muster up the energy to get ready, by the time I’ve put the kids to bed all I want to do is die on the sofa with a well earned glass of vino.

 Image by Oliver323

Although looking back through those old photo’s did make me feel a slight prang of longing for my pre baby, single life it also made me realise how meaninless my life actually was. I had bounced from course to course not really knowing what I wanted to do, I’d also bounced from boyfriend to boyfriend not really wanting to be with any of them, and even with all the parties, friends and wild nights I was the most depressed and lonely I have ever been in my life.

Now however, even though I’m tired, constantly look like I’ve been dragged through a hedge backwards and  have a serious case of agrophobia, I have never been happier in my life.

 Image by Peyri Herrera

 I never really get these woman that say things like ‘Just because I have children now doesn’t mean my life will have to change’. Mainly because I don’t see how it is possible to have children and your life not to change. Whether it be having less time to spend on the way you look, constantly feeling tired or it always becoming a military operation just to get out of the house. No one plans for them to take over your life, they just do.

Finding the balance between being the best mummy that you can but at the same time still feeling like a human being has to be the hardest thing about being a mother.

 Image by Darek Zon

So how much have your lives changed since having kids?

Terrifying experience

Last night the most terrifying thing happened to me and I woke up this morning feeling totally confused and scared.

In the night I awoke with a start because I thought I could hear H in our room, which was weird on it’s own because he never gets out of bed on his own in the night. I then went to sit up to have a look and realised that I was completely paralised! I literally couldn’t move any of my body, not even lift my head of of the pillow.
I completley freaked out and then I got confused because I thought I might still be asleep and was having one of those Lucid dreams where you can control what goes on in your dream.

I could still hear the noise in our room that I thought was H, still unable to move and then I freaked myself out even more by thinking that it was a ghost or spirit. Our new house is very old so this idea plays on my mind quite a bit.

Image by Mark Strozier

The last thing I remember was laying there, still paralised, and trying to convince myself that I was just dreaming and made myself go back to sleep.

The next thing I knew it was morning and I woke up really shaken up and freaked out! I told the other half about it straight away and he said that he remembered reading something about that kind of thing on the internet. I looked it up and apparently it’s called ‘Sleep Paralysis’.

‘A person may wake up and find themselves unable to move or speak as if they are frozen. He also may hear footsteps, see a ghost like creature or feel someone sitting on his chest.Throughout the history, people considered this phenomenon as work done by evil spirits. However, the modern science can explain the terrifying event as a Sleep Paralysis.’

‘A sleep paralyisis is possible a hereditary disorder in which one experiences very frightening seconds or minutes of total body paralysis. A victim in this state feels awake but he cannot move or speak. Common symptoms include feeling choked or suffocated, hearing strange noises like footsteps and voices, seeing beings or dark shadows and feeling an existance of someone in the room. ‘

‘When a person sleeps, his brain sends signals to inhibit any muscle contraction. If he comes into consciousness before the brain sends signals to activate muscle contraction, he cannot move his body and consequently becomes paralyzed.’

‘How an episode of sleep paralisis induces visual or auditory hallucinations is still not clear but it seems to have a significant relationship with anxiety.’

 SOURCE - Serendip’sexchange

I don’t really know what happened last night but one thing I know for sure is that I never ever want it to happen again and the stupid thing is that I’m now worried about going to sleep tonight.

It does, however, show you just how powerful the human mind really is.

Image by reighleblanc

I'm back!

We have internet at last, yey. 

Six weeks of being cut off from the world, I feel like I've missed out on something, not quite sure what though lol.

So what have I missed in the world of mummy blogging then? 

It's amazing how as soon as you don't have something, you realise how much you actually rely on it. 

I hope I still have some followers?

xgx